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Vladimir Putin on the murder of critic Boris Nemtsov
The cats spilled his treats, and he thought he was in trouble. This cracked me up.
Damn I'm good
Relationship status: complicated.
Now introducing your girlfriend's Favorite Restaurant
Never thought of it like that.
Your Man's Balls
This happening now. Missoula, Montana police baffled.
I was making a cake
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses
Tactical Roomba Mods
Does your beaver rest all day?
Girlfriend starts a hot strip tease and throws bra on me
The Missus saw a raccoon crossing the road this morning, so she slowed to let it pass... Then she lost track of it. Here's where it ended up.
This winter in upstate NY
You are to assume the role of a Chinese immigrant
Guess that would be for a beat down
When the cop pulls you over and asks if you've been drinking..
Spidey didn't have a good time in Narnia
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It probably doesn't help that I left for work early...